Date anyone..

We were just discussing dating, so Marc decides to give out a few tips!

Marc: I think my number one tip would be, don't take a girl to McDonalds. I did that twice with two different girls..

While in Maccy D's don't stare at the arse of the girl in front of you.

And when asking your date which bugger they'd like, and she asks to be taken home, do not proceed to buy yourself a meal! Even a happy meal.

BC

Adam: The coin had the Roman Emperor's head on the front and 500bc written on the back of it. Why did the shop keeper say it was a fake?

Marc: Is it because the romans didn't exist before Jesus!

Tree of Knowledge

Marc: So you work at the Arboretum, the art gallery?

Janet: An Arboretum is a place where Trees are kept!

Touching.

Anon: Marc, why are you poking the screen?

Marc: Just in case we've been upgraded to touch screen technology.

Man or Wife!

On the subject of male vegetarians, and the discussion gets onto Paul McCartney.

Marc: Who is Paul McCartney, is he the wife of Linda McCartney, the lasagna lady?!

*Pause*

Marc: She's got one leg.

Susan: No that's Heather Mills, who has one leg!

Crisps anyone?

Talk turns to Dannii Minogue.

Marc: She's had a baby. Because she's so plastic, what they did was, open her up like a bag of crisps, get the baby out, then just re-seal her. Jobs a good'un!

Presidential

Adam: Did you know that in about 2 years time, Sarah Palin could become the next President of the United States...

Marc: What, Michael Palin's wife?!

No more tears.. or tiers!

In the departmental meeting Helen is talking about, no more tiers.

Marc: No more teirs, Johnson's baby oil, no more tears!

Helen: Johnson's baby SHAMPOO! No more tears.

Watch it!

Marc: Do I have to watch TRON the original before I watch TRON Legacy?

Adam: You haven't watched TRON?

Marc: No, but I've watched Logun's Run.

Test Tickle

This is a test............tickle!