Safety first

Marc [commenting on a good shot Ant played during a game of FIFA street]: That was safe as a nut!

Ginger nuts

Darryl: Dam. I can't remember that lady's [client who he had just met] name.

Marc [thoughfully]: Well, she had ginger hair ... so was it Antonia?

Monkeying around

Marc [reading his emails]: Anthony's got some Sea Monkeys. Now, I don't see the point in Sea Monkeys - they're invisible.

Darryl [after he stops giggling like a girl]: Marc. They're not invisible, they grow in a few days.

Marc: Do they look like monkeys?

It's not easy being green

Marc: I've eaten frog's legs and although they're not a vegetable they ARE green.

[then, inexplicably....]

Marc: I bet they'll put that in next year's edition of the Bible.

Twice as rice

Garry [at the dinner table]: Marc, would you like some rice pudding for afters?

Marc: Is that like salmonella?

Swollen plums

[Anthony picks up a plum from a basket of fruit and starts eating it]

Marc: I can't eat those, they remind me too much of my dog.