Friday, February 05, 2010

Mirror Signal..... LISTEN!

Marc: I got to sell my car, but I feel guilty about selling it as its to dangerous to drive.

Adam: Sell to 'Webuyanycar.com'...

Marc: Good idea, whats the website?

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Incompetence

Marc: What's that thing old people have when they keep going to the loo?

*PAUSE*

Marc: Incompetence?!

Adam: Incontinence, it means they don't make it...

Marc: Ah, well I think I have that and at this rate I doubt I'll make it...


*Marc leaves the room to go to the loo*

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Rock hard tree!

Office chat about pomegranate and Marc as always over hears!

Marc: Pomegranate? Thats that grey brick isn't it?

Adam: You assume pomegranate is a rock because it has granate in it?

Marc: Yeah, is it not the grey brick?

Adam: No, you're thinking about the breeze block!

Marc: Ah I see...

I love cake

Someone is giving out cake in the office, it's got a layer of pink and white sponge.

Marc: Oh, this looks like Nuremberg cake...

Office laughs!

Susan: Do you mean battenburg cake?

Marc: 'Blank look'!

Monday, August 17, 2009

Blind luck..

Marc is looking out the window.

Marc: Hey, look at that man handgliding past the window...

Everyone looks...

Susan: Thats a helicopter!

Marc: Blimey, my eyes are bad!

Friday, July 10, 2009

I'll be back

Gus: Wow, I never realised Daniel Radcliff was quite so short.

Marc: Yeah. I heard Arnold Swartznegger is only about 5’2 or 5’3.

Gus: No he’s not! He’s around 6 foot something.

Marc: Well 5’3 it’s not that short.

After looking up the height of Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Gus: See, he’s 6’2.

Marc: Oh, this person, arr, he told me… well, I was told he was 5’3.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Notre DAMN

Last night in the pub...

Nick: What school do you go to?

Girl: Reeds.

Nick: Do you know Kurt, Kurt Williams?

Girl: No.

Nick: Do you know his sister Amy?

Ams: Why would she know, she went to my school...

Marc: Where did you go?

Ams: Notre Dame School...

Marc: Is that in Belgium?

Nick: Cobham actually!