Disco biscuits

Marc [eats one of Andy's biscuits]: Mmmmm. I like the salty sugaryness of it. What is that? Salt?

Fell out the tree

[Marc and Garry are talking about baldness]

Garry: You know Duncan Goodhugh?

Marc: Is that the dude with the big feet?

Hot in here

Marc [suffering]: It's hot in here today.

Garry: Well, you are wearing a jumper...

Marc: Yeah, but i can't take it off.

Garry: Oh, you not wearing a tshirt underneath?

Marc: Yeah, but it's really tiny.

Check me out

[Garry walks past Marc and ruffles his hair]

Marc: Don't do that! You'll mess it up and girls won't look at me twice!

Jew

Anthony: If I was a rapper I think I would be called 'Nice Tea'.

Marc: If you were a rabbi?

Lips inc.

Marc: Do you remember when i used to do this?

[Marc makes an otherworldly noise. Anthony looks puzzled.]

Marc: It's whistling and blowing out at the same time.

[When the office points out that you blow out when you whistle anyway Marc spends the next few minutes holding up his hand in front of his face and whistling into it to check.]

Scrumptious

[Daz and Anthony are trying to persuade Marc that they have picked the apples that they are eating at their desks are off a tree in the park]

Marc [looks horrified]: Don't be stupid, you can't eat them straight off the tree like that!